Yesterday I was buying 2 large bags of Purina dog
chow at Wal-Mart, for my
dog. I was about to check out when a woman behind me
asked if I had a dog. What
did she think, that I had an elephant? Since I had
little else to do, on
impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog,
and that I was starting the
Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't
because I ended up in the
hospital last time. On the bright side though, I'd
lost 50 pounds before I
awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming
out of every hole in my body
and IV's in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet
and that the way that it
works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets
and simply eat one or two
every time you feel hungry and that the food is
nutritionally complete so I was
going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
practically every one in
the line was enthralled with my story by now.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive
care because the dog food
had poisoned me. I told her no; I had stopped in
the middle of the parking lot
to lick my butt and a car hit me.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a
heart attack, he was
laughing so hard!
WAL-MART won't let me shop there anymore.
chow at Wal-Mart, for my
dog. I was about to check out when a woman behind me
asked if I had a dog. What
did she think, that I had an elephant? Since I had
little else to do, on
impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog,
and that I was starting the
Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't
because I ended up in the
hospital last time. On the bright side though, I'd
lost 50 pounds before I
awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming
out of every hole in my body
and IV's in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet
and that the way that it
works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets
and simply eat one or two
every time you feel hungry and that the food is
nutritionally complete so I was
going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
practically every one in
the line was enthralled with my story by now.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive
care because the dog food
had poisoned me. I told her no; I had stopped in
the middle of the parking lot
to lick my butt and a car hit me.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a
heart attack, he was
laughing so hard!
WAL-MART won't let me shop there anymore.
